The Difficult Issue of the Duchy of Clafouti

 

The Situation: 

You and your group are the advisory council to the king of Ya-Ya Land, Gloofus.  Your king is not terribly interested in running his kingdom, so he tends to take the advice of your council.  He is much more concerned with riding horses, practicing his sword-fighting, and meeting whatever daughters the local gentry [upper class] may have on hand.  He is 43 years old, single, unintelligent, ugly, and ill-tempered.  His great goals are to be wealthier than yesterday, to be more militarily powerful, to have a lot of sex, and to have a son to pass it all down to eventually.  He does not go to church, but he does worry about going to Hell.

 

When the advice of the council does not turn out to be good, as happened last time, he often has one of your members tried for treason and branded with a red-hot iron.  When your council gives him good advice and he does well, he tends to be very generous.  Because you are all close to the king, you are not popular with the people of the kingdom.  Without the king you would be in danger.

 

The "situation at hand:"

The duke of a friendly duchy, the Duchy of Clafouti on the borders of your kingdom, has died.  He left a 13-year-old daughter as his only heir.  The duke's lands were not part of the Kingdom of Ya-Ya.  They contain valuable forest resources and one quite wealthy town.  The duke's castle is famously strong, but poorly defended at present.  A strong contingent of rich businessmen from Clafouti City would support King Gloofus if he tried to take over the duchy.  The people of Clafouti don't speak Ya-Ya language, and they are a different sort of Christians from yourselves.  The daughter, Britney, the new Duchess of Clafouti, wants only to be a nun.  She plans to take her vows, move to a convent, and then turn the duchy over to her uncle, Pablo the Good.  Pablo is reputed to be an honest man and an excellent scholar.  For his schooling he studied at a university in the capitol city of one of your enemy countries.  He is opposed by the rich merchants of Clafouti City who are willing to support King Gloofus because Pablo plans to raise taxes to build an army capable of defending the duchy.  Pablo wants to be a good ruler for the people of Clafouti.

 

The Task:

You have received the advice of three specialists on the situation at hand.  You must decide which advice to take.  The king doesn't like to study.  The king has asked your group to provide him with a report  and recommendations about what he should do.  When he gets back from hunting he'll act on your recommendations.

 

What to do:

I would suggest that all of your read all of the advice, perhaps out loud to each other.  Each person in the group should write a summary of one advisor.  Divide up the summaries of the advisors and summarize each of the 3.  A summary is a condensed version of the larger text.  Try to explain the intention, main points, and tone of each advisor.

 

Fill out the decision matrix from the board.  This matrix covers the main issues of the situation and will help you make your decision between the three advisors.

 

Assign someone in the group to write your official letter to the king.  In this letter you should tell him which advisor to go with and why.  YOU MAY NOT PICK AND CHOOSE ADVICE FROM ALL OF THE ADVISORS.  Pick one advisor over all of the rest.


Advisor #1 - Polonius Verdado

 

Good King Gloofus,

 

there is only one honorable course open to your illustrious self: allow the girl her freedom to become a nun and let the good people of Clafouti to be governed by Pablo the good.

 

The Duchy of Clafouti has never been an enemy of Ya-Ya.  The now-dead duke always maintained his independence.  Pablo the Good will do the same, turning the duchy into a powerful ally.  Trade with the duchy will be good if we allow the place its independence.  Pablo's military plans should allow him to defend us from attack from the direction of his duchy as he would certainly not help our enemies against us if we showed our faith in him.  As you have surely read in his books, Pablo is an excellent historian and he knows how a country should be properly run.  He will give his people their maximum freedoms and allow them to follow whatever religious practices they desire.  If we provide them with a peaceful good example, they may return to the fold of our most wonderful church.

 

It would be criminal not to allow Britney of Clafouti her freedom.  She wishes to follow the call of God, the highest calling of any human, even if her religious beliefs are irregular.  As a woman, she would make a poor ruler anyway.  Pablo the Good would be a just and good Duke.

 

The religious decisions of the people of Clafouti are clearly mistaken, but it would not help to attempt to convert them by force.  Our best approach would be to treat the people of Clafouti with kindness and show them the truth of our religion by good example.

 

We would encounter strong opposition if we attempted to take over Clafouti.  The people there do not speak our beautiful language and their religion, while incorrect, is dear to their hearts.  To rule Clafouti we would have to place expensive troops there and be willing to shed much blood.  It is true that some of the more traitorous merchants of Clafouti city would support us, but they are clearly not trustworthy if they would sell out their own homeland.

 

Peaceful trade with Clafouti would benefit both our kingdom and Clafouti itself.  Clafouti's rich forest would provide excellent timber for our new fleets.  The famous iron-workers of Clafouti City would produce high-quality weapons for our armies, as well as for their own.  While it is true that we will have to pay for these goods, it would be cheaper to buy these things than to pay for the troops and the war required to hold the duchy against the will of its people.

 

The issue of Clafouti will allow your royal highness to show his good character to the rest of the world.  We must prove that were are a trusting, honorable, and kind people.  With such a fine reputation the other nations of our globe could only treat us well.


Advisor #2 - Melvin Ozma

 

The Duchy of Clafouti requires careful attention my lord Gloofus, King of Ya-Ya.  Issues of religion, trade, and war are all seriously intertwined in Clafouti.

 

First and foremost, as a follower of the true version of Christianity, you must make faith your guide in this issue.  The people of Clafouti are heretics and much pressure must be put on them to force them to relinquish the errors of their ways.

 

First of all, The Duchess of Clafouti, Britney, should be warned not to enter a nunnery.  The world needs no more heretic nuns.  Equally importantly, if she went into a convent, Pablo, called "the Good," would become the Duke.  Britney should be warned to remain in the world and be directed to await your approval in marriage.  Her father has died and her uncle does not have the best interests of our two states at heart.  You must act as her father, in a very real and legally binding sense.  Hopefully, you will be able to find a trusted member of your own family, such as your cousin Flip, to marry her.  In five years Flip will turn 13, and thus be of age to marry the misguided Britney.  Through this marriage, the duchy can be folded into the kingdom of Ya-Ya peacefully.  You need only be patient my lord.

 

Pablo is a dangerous heretic [disbeliever].  He is not even committed to his own religion.  He proposes to allow the citizens of Clafouti to worship as they choose.  He also plans on strengthening his army.  To pay for this army, he will tax your best friends in the duchy, the merchants.  Pablo must be gotten out of the way one way or the other.

 

However, to conquer Clafouti militarily would be an expensive mistake.  Instead we should move troops to the border, intimidate the weak girl, and find some enemy of Pablo's to put him out of the way.  He is said to study fish in his heretical scientific experiments, and perhaps it would be best if ended up sleeping with them, the fishes.  We should demand tribute from the Clafoutins in exchange for our protection.  We should also demand that they allow missionaries from our great and true version of Christianity to go amongst them and inform them of the error of their ways.  We will not force them to convert, but we must be allowed to tell our side of the story.  If they do not agree with our demands, then we can make war on them with a clean conscience.

 

This solution is not perfect, but it is workable.  It would be best to conquer Clafouti or hand it over to a trusted man, such as the departed Duke.  Neither of these is an option at present.  Conquest would be difficult, expensive, and risky.  There is no trusted person at hand to hold the duchy in our interests.  As a result, we should do as much good as we can, with missionaries, but defend our interests as well.  The Duchy of Clafouti is weak at present and it is in our interest to keep them so.  They will bow to firm pressure.  You, Great King Gloofus, are perfectly placed to press them onto the correct path.


Advisor #3 - Karloff Rove

 

Most illustrious and honorable Gloofus, King of Ya-Ya, defender of the one true faith,

 

Clafouti is a dessert just waiting to be eaten my lord.  Scarf it down!  Britney of Clafouti herself is young, beautiful, and would likely bear you many sons.  Young and ignorant as she is, she would likely leave you your freedom to pursue those desires that are to be expected in a powerful king such as yourself.

 

If not swallowed, the Duchy of Clafouti is a disaster waiting to happen.  Pablo the "Good" is a doddering old history teacher.  He's an idiot at best and a threat at worst.  He plans on raising taxes on our only friends in the Duchy, the good merchants who support your interests there.  More importantly, he plans on turning those taxes into cannons, guns, and soldiers on your very border.  The old Duke of Clafouti was a non-threatening nobody, and thus could be ignored.  Pablo is a schemer who will build the duchy into a dangerous threat to Ya-Ya Land.  How long before he decides to invite in foreign armies to attack us in exchange for a piece of our pie?  Who knows what treachery he learned while studying in the schools of our enemies.

 

Bluntly put your majesty, you need an honest wife.  Your adventures amongst the daughters of the gentry have proved you to be very much a man, but you have no legal son to take over the Kingdom should you be incapacitated or, God forbid, killed by an enemy.  It would be a shame to see the glorious kingdom you have built with your own sweat and genius fall to ruins, obliterating your name for history.  Britney is reported to be beautiful; she's got huge tracts of land.  Her good family and youth ensure that she would bear you the best children.  She is of marriageable age and could be taken.  I'm sure you could convince her to convert from her detestable religion and treat you with the respect and discretion that you would demand from the woman who would carry your children.

 

The priests of Ya-Ya seem to want you to force our wonderful version of Christianity on the Clafutans.  While it would be a wonderful thing if the people of Clafouti ended their religious errors, I think it would be a mistake to worry too much about this issue.  To attack the religion of the duchy at the same time you attempt to absorb it into your kingdom would be a recipe for disaster.  Let them keep their wrong-headed religion for now.  When they are firmly in your grasp you can take more severe measures to end their heresy [wrong belief].

 

Conquering Clafouti would be simple, but holding it might be difficult if not handled correctly.  The merchants of Clafouti and the marriage to Britney will provide us with most of the aid we need to take the place.  The castle is poorly defended.  If we struck quickly and with much force, we would be saved a great deal of effort later.  Move in powerfully, execute Pablo, make examples of a few other expendable Clafoutins, and the place will be yours.  True, you will have to garrison the duchy for some time, but taxes and the rich forests of the land will practically pay for themselves.  In time the people will accept the legality of your marriage to Britney, no matter what unfortunate circumstances may have occurred to secure the wedding.

 

In times like this, it is useless to worry anything other than the interests of the Kingdom of Ya-Ya, which are nothing other than your own interests.  You are Ya-Ya Land my absolute lord.  In one short sharp blow against rich Clafouti you can win yourself a docile wife, a rich land, and the glory of conquest.  If you fail to do this, you will leave a dangerous territory on our border ruled by a man you will not be able to control.  A few quick months of brutality followed by religious toleration and a firm hand will turn the Clafoutins to Ya-Yoids in short order.